Dear Sam's Club,
When you stopped carrying my favorite unsalted premium nut mix, I wavered a little in our friendship, but like all love quarrels, I eventually forgave you and came back through your doors. Now, two and a half months later (really, not that I noticed the date you stopped carrying it or anything), you once again pull on the strings of our friendship. And that's a deal breaker, ladies! I can forgive your nasty floors, your always-way-too-long-and-slow-checkout lines, your unhelpful employees, your lack of good DVDs or books, and your always-changing promo items, but this is a travesty and has left me beyond devastated. What is it, you ask, that has made me want to make a clean break of our friendship? What is it, you ask, that would make me act so drastically? You, yes you, Sam's Club, have stopped carrying the item I buy the most frequently and the most in quantity. The item that Brent and I go through faster than toilet paper. How can you say that hummus is "seasonal" and still sleep...or in your case, be unvandalized...at night? How can you not only stop carrying my favorite flavor of hummus, but also any hummus itself? So, dear Sam's Club, I regret to inform you that our friendship is now at an end.
Sincerely,
Lori Gail
Who can tell me the tv show and the movie that I quoted in the letter? Anyone? Bueler?
oh man - no more hummus. this might cause a break in my friendship w/sam's also! they have (excuse me) had amazing hummus. *sigh*
ReplyDeleteDude. I don't know this, but as soon as I do, I'm going to watch that movie.
ReplyDelete